Week 23: Enough is Enough

Day:  160          Verses Memorized:  396          Working On:  Review (for real)

The John Squad
Please click here to chart your own progress - even though I'm the only one still doing this

My Progress:
Wahoo!  Chapter 8 is finished!  I can't believe I finally made it through.  However, this week I ended up breaking my "review" rule.  My time is so limited and if I reviewed previous chapters each day, I wouldn't have any time left for moving forward.  So this week, I am not allowed to move on to Chapter 9.  I am going to really take the entire week to go back and review all the other chapters.  For real this time.  I mean it.

Some Thoughts:
Enough is enough is enough already!  Seriously.  What is the matter with me?!

For weeks now (ever since Chapter 4, really) I have been wallowing in guilt and self-pity at my sin.  No more!

I remember a few weeks ago when I first began to memorize the story about the adulterous woman.  I was shocked at how I defended the woman's sin and took her side, when really there is never an excuse for sin. As time went on, I continued to feel more and more broken-hearted over my own sin. That's all fine and good; we ought to be broken-hearted about our sin. However, I was going down a road of frustration and defeat, feeling like a hopeless slave to my sin. (Certainly not feeling like I'm "more than a conqueror".)

Thank you, Lord, it hit me today.  (I'm not sure how something I already 'know' can 'hit me' again and again as if it's something new, but apparently that happens quite frequently.)  There I was, cooking through Chapter 8, (my favorite time, when I have the entire chapter memorized and I'm able to recite the whole thing from start to finish without messing up) and all of a sudden, the tears started to come.

John 8:10-11  Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they?  Has no one condemned you?"  "No one, sir," she said.  "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared.  "Go now and leave your life of sin."

Yes, He clearly tells the woman to leave her life of sin.  By no means does He condone what she has done.  But how on earth did I miss His beautiful love for this woman?!  How did I not see His tenderness and mercy in the way He treats her?  It's like I can hear His voice saying the words to her and they sound so sweet and kind.  Only our beautiful Savior could balance His hatred toward sin with the purest love for the sinner.

So, enough is enough!  Yes, Heidi, you are a sinner.  You are going to screw up time and time again.  Yes, your heart should break over your sin and lead to genuine repentance.  But then let's move on, for crying out loud!  Let's look at the bigger picture here!  Let's grab hold of the rest of the Gospel message!  Why have I not been rejoicing that these sins are completely wiped away and gone forever?  They have been paid for, bought, redeemed, cast away, removed; they are no longer here!  Praise God, I am no longer a slave and I am indeed more than a conqueror!  I am God's child and dagnabbit, He loves me!  So Heidi, let's not focus on your sin.  Let's focus on God's amazing, amazing love for you.  Let's look at what Jesus did and rejoice that there will come a day when you can stand in glory and enjoy a new heaven and a new earth where sin is no more. 

I hated being the guy at the Pool of Bethesda.  I love being the adulterous woman.  (That doesn't sound right, but you know what I mean, hehe.)  I love the picture of Jesus standing up so that He can be face to face with her, looking into her eyes and saying that she is forgiven.  My commentary says that the word "woman" was the same feeling as when He addressed Mary in Chapter 2.  It was an expression of respect and love.  And you know what, looking at both stories, Jesus treated each one with just as much love and mercy as the other. 

Time to stop dwelling on the guilt of my sin and start living in the victory I have over it because of Jesus and how much He loves me!